Have you ever wondered why children bully? If your child is being bullied, it’s understandable to react negatively to the inappropriate behavior, but there are a variety of reasons children bully. Some may come from homes where they witness abuse or are possibly being abused themselves; some lack empathy because they were never taught it; some may be spoiled and get everything they want so they feel entitled; some desire popularity; and others may feel jealous or inadequate. According to Yale Medicine, one in four children in the United States are bullied each year.1
Listed below are bullying prevention tips from the Children’s Hospital of Orange County:2
- It’s not tattling to tell a trusted adult; get help so you don’t have to experience being bullied
- Be confident, stand tall, use a calm voice and make eye contact; confidence detours bullies
- Respond in a fair and respectful way to avoid escalating the situation
- Avoid the person if possible; don’t act in fear, but avoidance is also a form of de-escalation
- Hang around with friends or in groups so that you don’t have to face the bully alone
- It’s NEVER your fault; nobody deserves to be bullied so speak up today
According to the American Psychological Association, cyberbullying occurs frequently and allows bullies to use platforms like YouTube, Instagram and Snapchat to prey on their victims anytime. This isn’t just an issue in school anymore, it’s a widespread issue that children may experience 24/7. Some platforms allow anonymous messages to be sent so it’s difficult for the victim to prove who the bully is, even if they are certain. To properly prevent bullying, we should come together as a community and ensure we are taking appropriate steps to prevent it. Teachers should be on the lookout during school, parents should be on the lookout at home for warning signs, and adults should defend victims who aren’t able to defend themselves in public settings.3
Parents can take a proactive role by paying close attention to their children’s behavior. Signs of bullying could include: avoiding school, decreased appetite, nightmares, depression or anxiety. If your child expresses concerns about being bullied, take them seriously and have open conversations. Inform them about measures they can take to stop the bullying, inform their teachers and let them know it’s not their job to fight back but that you will intervene on their behalf. If your child expresses warning signs of being a bully, inform them of how it affects and hurts their victims. Teach children that there can be long-term affects from bullying and that it’s not a game or amusing.3
Depending on the age of the child, you may want to educate them that bullying can have legal consequences as well.3 Encourage your children to defend others who are being bullied and that may help prevent your child from bullying others. Taking a proactive approach rather than reacting is a great way to increase prevention. If you are interested in becoming a member and gaining access to our Resource Center ($10/month or $99/annually), visit https://advocatefortheinnocent.org/memberships/ to learn more.
1 – https://www.yalemedicine.org/news/understanding-bullying
2 – https://health.choc.org/handout/anti-bullying-tips-for-kids-and-teens/
3 – https://www.apa.org/topics/bullying/prevent