According to Psychology Today, intuition is often referred to as “gut feelings,” as they seem to arise fully formed from some deep part of us. Intuition, like first impressions, serves the brain’s need to predict and prepare for what will happen next. I have talked to many parents who have children that are survivors of child molestation or abuse and most express a feeling of guilt for not recognizing the signs immediately, or shortly after the abuse occurred. Most parents understand the weight of being responsible for protecting their children and are often devastated when they learn the abuse continued for years or it took years for the child to share the incidence of abuse.1
One of the most interesting factors in many of these cases is that most parents knew something was wrong, but couldn’t determine the cause. Some parents wrote off the change in behavior to life circumstances (bullying, social awkwardness, medical condition, divorce, death in the family, relocation to another state, new sibling, etc.) and some may have had a thought in the back of their mind that abuse could be the cause, but quickly dismissed the possibility because the reality was too grim to bear. I think most of us want to believe that our intuition would ensure we recognize predators or signs of our children being abused, but the unfortunate reality is that intuition alone is not enough to combat the deceptiveness of predators.
According to Berkeley Well Being Institute, instincts are defined as the tendency to make complex and specific responses to environmental stimuli without requiring thought or reason. The major difference between instinct and intuition is instinct takes action. Most of us live in a society where we aren’t consistently threatened by harm so our instincts aren’t triggered often. Our environment allows us to rely more on intuition and although this can be just as informative as instinct, the urgency to act isn’t as apparent. A better understanding of the danger, prevalence and devastation of child molestation and abuse will help us shift our intuition to instinct and take action immediately.2
Let’s consider the example of a child being bullied at school. If a parent learns that their child is being bullied, they may decide to talk to their children, talk to a teacher or the principal, or maybe even talk to the parent of the bully, and potentially take steps to ensure their child isn’t put in situations where the abuse may continue. If a parent is in the pickup line at school and sees a bully physically slapping or hitting their child, that parent is much more likely to get out of the car, walk over to the bully and take immediate action. This example sheds light on the stronger impact instinct provides versus intuition. If you are interested in becoming a member and gaining access to our Resource Center ($10/month or $99/annually), visit https://advocatefortheinnocent.org/memberships/ to learn more.
1 – https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/intuition#:~:text=Intuition%20is%20a%20form%20of,past%20experience%20and%20cumulative% 20knowledge
2 – https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/instincts.htm